Genealogy Humor

Thanks Patricia. A real Xmas story and true.

Sindre, thanks for sharing some of your memories & Norway's traditions for this holiday season. They are interesting. I hope others will also share memories of holiday traditions also. Geni is a Small, Small World (Think this Disney song should be Geni's theme song!!!) and I am sure others have memories & traditions beside gift giving & family dinners. Soooooo, if you would like to share those, please feel free to do so here. It is such a shame that Christmas has become so commercialized!!!!!!!!!

I may look on the internet to see what traditions are in other countries... if there would be interest?????

THE CHRISTMAS PAGEANT
 
My husband and I had been happily married (most of the time) for five years but hadn't been blessed with a baby.

I decided to do some serious praying and promised God that if he would give us a child, I would be a perfect mother, love it with all my heart and raise it with His word as my guide.

God answered my prayers and blessed us with a son.

The next year God blessed us with another son.

The following year, He blessed us with yet another son. 

The year after that we were blessed with a daughter.

My husband thought we'd been blessed right into poverty.
We now had four children, and the oldest was only four years old.

I learned never to ask God for anything unless I meant it. As a minister once told me,  "If you pray for rain, make sure you carry an umbrella."

I began reading a few verses of the Bible to the children each day as they lay in their cribs. 

I was off to a good start.  God had entrusted me with four children and I didn't want to disappoint Him.

I tried to be patient the day the children smashed two-dozen eggs on the kitchen floor searching for baby chicks.

I tried to be understanding... when they started a hotel for homeless frogs in the spare bedroom, although it took me nearly two hours to catch all twenty-three frogs.

When my daughter poured ketchup all over herself and rolled up in a blanket to see how it felt to be a hot dog, I tried to see the humor rather than the mess. 

In spite of changing over twenty-five thousand diapers, never eating a hot meal and never sleeping for more than thirty minutes at a time, I still thank God daily for my children.

While I couldn't keep my promise to be a perfect mother - I didn't even come close... I did keep my promise to raise them in the Word of God. 

I knew I was missing the mark just a little when I told my daughter we were going to church to worship God, and she wanted to bring a bar of soap along to "wash up" Jesus, too.

Something was lost in the translation when I explained that God gave us everlasting life, and my son thought it was generous of God to give us his "last wife."

My proudest moment came during the children's Christmas pageant.

My daughter was playing Mary; two of my sons were shepherds and my youngest son was a wise man.  This was their moment to shine.

My five-year-old shepherd had practiced his line, "We found the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes." 

But he was nervous and said, "The baby was wrapped in wrinkled clothes." 

My four-year-old "Mary" said, "That's not 'wrinkled clothes,' silly. That's dirty, rotten clothes."

A wrestling match broke out between Mary and the shepherd and was stopped by an angel, who bent her halo and lost her left wing. 

I slouched a little lower in my seat when Mary dropped the doll representing Baby Jesus, and it bounced down the aisle crying,  "Mama-mama." 

Mary grabbed the doll, wrapped it back up and held it tightly as the wise men arrived.

My other son stepped forward wearing a bathrobe and a paper crown, knelt at the manger and announced, "We are the three wise men, and we are bringing gifts of gold, common sense and fur."

The congregation dissolved into laughter, and the pageant got a standing ovation. 

"I've never enjoyed a Christmas program as much as this one," laughed the pastor, wiping tears from his eyes. "For the rest of my life, I'll never hear the Christmas story without thinking of gold, common sense and fur."

"My children are my pride and my joy and my greatest blessing," I said as I dug through my purse for an aspirin.

Jesus had no servants, yet they called Him Master.
Had no degree, yet they called Him Teacher.
Had no medicines, yet they called Him Healer.
Had no army, yet kings feared Him.
He won no military battles, yet He conquered the world.
He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him.
He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today.
 
Feel honored to serve such a Leader who loves us.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!

The Colors of Christmas
http://www.whychristmas.com/customs/25th.shtml

There are several colors, which are traditionally associated with Christmas. This site uses Red, Green and Gold. But why do we have them and what do the colors represent?

Most the colors and their meanings come from the western/northern european traditions and customs, when Christmas is in the middle of winter and it's dark and cold.

Green
* Evergreen plants, like Holly, Ivy and Mistletoe have been used for thousands of years to decorate and brighten up buildings during the long dark winter. They also reminded people that spring would come and that winter wouldn't last forever!
* The Romans would exchange evergreen branches during January as a sign of good luck. The ancient Egyptians used to bring palm branches into their houses during the mid winter festivals.
* In many parts of Europe during the middle ages, Paradise plays were performed, often on Christmas Eve. They told Bible stories to people who couldn't read. The 'Paradise Tree' in the Garden of Eden in the play was normally a pine tree with red apples tied to it.
* Now the most common use of green at Christmas are Christmas Trees.

Red
* As mentioned above, an early use of red at Christmas were the apples on the paradise tree. They represented the fall of Adam in the plays.
* Red is also the color of Holly berries, which is said to represent the blood of Jesus when he died on the cross.
* Red is also the color of Bishops robes. These would have been worn by St. Nicholas and then also became Santa's uniform!

Gold
* Gold is the color of the Sun and light - both very important in the dark winter. And both red and gold are the colors of fire that you need to keep you warm.
* Gold was also one of the presents brought to the baby Jesus by one of the wise men and traditionally it's the color used to show the star that the wise men followed.
Silver is sometimes used instead of (or with) gold. But gold is a 'warmer' color.

White
* White is often associated with purity and peace in western cultures. The snow of winter is also very white!
* White paper wafers were also sometimes used to decorate paradise trees. The wafers represented the bread eaten during Christian Communion or Mass, when Christians remember that Jesus died for them.
* White is used by most churches as the color of Christmas, when the altar is covered with a white cloth (in the Russian Orthodox Church Gold is used for Christmas).

Blue
* The color blue is often associated with Mary, the mother of Jesus. In medieval times blue dye and paint was more expensive than gold! So it would only be worn by Royal families and very rich people. Mary was often painted wearing blue to show she was very important.
* Blue can also represent the color of the sky and heaven.
* During Advent, purple and sometimes blue is used in most churches for the color of the altar cloth (in the Russian Orthodox Church red is used for advent).

Kids seem to hear things differently than adults, don't they??? Here are some prime examples. Hope you chuckle a few times as you read this.

CHRISTMAS CAROLS
As Interpreted By Kids!

A teacher in Atlanta asked her students to write the words to their favorite Holiday / Christmas Carols; here are some of the humorous lines she received:
*  Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly 

* De three kings of porridge and tar 

* On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me 

* Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire. 

* He's makin a list, chicken and rice. 

* Noel, Noel, Barney's the king of Israel. 

* With the jelly toast proclaim 

* Olive, the other reindeer. (all of the other reindeer) 

* Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say 

* Sleep in heavenly peas 

* In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he is sparse and brown 

* You'll go down in listerine 

* Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay  

* O come, froggy faithful

History of the song: The 12 Days of Christmas
Everyone has heard & probably sung this song a time or two (or more???) and some may wish it to perdition as you can’t get it out of your head!!! But do you know the history of it??? Here is one explanation.

The Twelve Days of Christmas

There is one Christmas Carol that has always baffled me. What in the world do leaping lords, French hens, swimming swans, and especially the partridge who won't come out of the pear tree have to do with Christmas?

The Twelve Days of Christmas originated as a children's poem in a book called Mirth about Mischief in 1760. In the 20th century, composer Frederic Austin (1872-1952) added some of his own words and adapted a melody from a European folk song dating back to at least the 16th century. The song has been a favorite Christmas Carol for many years, although many people sing it without understanding the foundational meaning.

Celebrating the 12 days of Christmas is a tradition almost 2,000 years old. The 12 day/night observances begin December 25/26th, Christmas Day, and culminate on January 5/6th, the day of Epiphany (a Christian feast day which celebrates the revelation of God in human form, in the person of Jesus Christ).

Over the centuries, different cultures, churches and families have created their own 12-day celebrations. Traditions vary greatly, from elaborate festivals to days of fasting; from providing food for the poor to hanging out a stocking to be filled on Christmas Eve. Even people who don't recognize Christmas as the celebration of the birth of Christ, sometimes unwittingly take part in 12-day traditions, such as hanging a wreath on the front door -- a tradition handed down from the Pilgrims who hung the wreath on Christmas day as a 'house blessing.' The Pilgrims adapted this idea from a house-blessing ritual dating back to the 12-day celebrations of the 4th century.

From 1558 until 1829, Roman Catholics in England were not permitted to practice their faith openly because King Henry VIII had a falling out with the Catholic Church & started his own “Protestant Church” (now the Church of England). It was, in fact illegal for Catholics to practice their kind of Christianity in public or private. In the carol, the days are supposed to represent special symbols and have hidden meanings, because it was illegal & considered an imprisonable crime to have anything in writing including a Catholic Bible that would indicate that you were a Catholic. Someone during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics. Although there is NO evidence that this is true & it seems most likely just to be a folk song and the special ‘Catholic’ meanings were added at a MUCH later date as all of the symbols can be used by Protestants & other Christians, not just by Catholics!

The song has two levels of meaning: the surface meaning plus a hidden meaning known only to members of their church. Each element in the carol has a code word for a religious reality, which the children could remember.

* 1. The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ. (In ancient times a partridge was often used as mythological symbol of a divine, sacred king. Partridges weren't introduced into England, from France, until the 1770s, which also points to any extra meanings being added later!)
* 2. Two turtledoves were the Old and New Testaments of the Bible.
* 3. Three French hens stood for the Christian Trinity: God the Father, His Son Jesus and the Holy Spirit. (The hens could also mean faith, hope and love - the three gifts of the Holy Spirit. [See 1 Corinthians 13]; or the Wise men who visited Jesus; or the three gifts they brought him!)
* 4. The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke & John in the New Testament of the Bible.. (They could also mean the four major Old Testament prophets [Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, and Daniel]; or the four horsemen of the Apocalypse!)
5. The five golden rings are the five senses. (They could also refer to the first five books of the Bible also called the Pentateuch, the Books of Moses or the Torah.)
* 6. The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.
* 7. Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit--Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy. [See 1 Corinthians 12:8-11, Romans 12, Ephesians 4, 1 Peter 4:10-11]
* 8. The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes, Jesus' teachings on happiness. (See Matthew 5:3-10)
* 9. Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit--Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control. [See Galatians 5:22] (The 9 ladies dancing could also mean the nine muses from Greek Mythology.)
* 10. The ten lords a-leaping were the Ten Commandments in the Bible. (See Exodus 20)
* 11. The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples of Jesus. (They could also represent eleven thousand [meaning a lot of people] who had been martyred (killed) for the Christian faith.)
* 12. The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve disciples of Jesus (They could also mean the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed.)

So there is your history lesson for today... so pass it on if you wish!!!

Merry Christmas Everyone

Oh, if you are interested in what all of these gifts would cost a few years ago, check out this site: http://myfox8.com/2012/11/26/all-items-in-12-days-of-christmas-now-...

In 2017, the cost of the 12 days of gift giving totals $34,558.65 and inched just 0.6% higher this year, less than the 2.2% rise in the Consumer Price Index... See: https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2017/11/15/buying/862441001/

I think Christmas traditions are interesting, and they vary so much from country to country.

I lived in Holland as a student for some time, and there they have the tradition of Sinterklaas and Zwarte Piet. In Leiden where I lived Sinterklaas came on a boat in the canal, and he looks like a cross between a bishop and Santa Claus. He has a helper who is traditionally a black boy who gives sweets and gifts to the children.

There are also other traditions. On the day of Sinterklaas (5th December) my landlord had put a bag on my doorhandle with a big chocolate «S» (for my name) in it, together with a poem he had made especially for me. What a sweet tradition.

There are so many different and varied traditions just in Germany alone (modern-day Germany) – but traditions that I am not so aware of are traditions in Catholic countries and in Latin-America – for instance Spain, Italy, Mexico, Brazil. And what about the Philippines and South Africa? Now, that would be both fun and interesting to know more about.

Not to mention the Christmas Food! I am sure this must be a highlight in most countries :)

Some links to english Wikipedia:

* Julebukking (Norway) - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julebukking
* Åsgårdsreia (Norway) - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_Hunt
* Jólasveinar (Iceland) - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yule_Lads
* Sinterklaas (Netherlands) - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sinterklaas

By the way, very interesting what you wrote about the song 'The 12 Days of Christmas' :)

Christmas Humor, part 1

Christmas Reading:
Q: What are the best books to read during the holidays?
A: 
** The Lord of the Five Golden Rings
** No Country for Old Menorahs
** For Whom the Jingle Bells Toll
** Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secret Santas
** Frankincense and Sensibility

Q: What does the Grinch do with a baseball bat?
A: Hits a gnome and runs.

Q: What do you get when you cross a duck with Santa?
A: Christmas quacker.

Q: Where do you find reindeer?
A: It depends on where you leave them!

Q: What do you call a scary looking reindeer?
A: cariboo.

Q: Who is a Christmas tree’s favorite singer?
A: Spruce Springsteen

Q: What’s Santa’s favorite snack food?
A: Crisp Pringles.

Q: How is the alphabet different on Christmas than any other day?
A: On Christmas, it has Noel.

Q: “Why didn’t Rudolph get a good report card?”
A: “Because he went down in History.”

Q: What Do You Sing At An Elf’s Birthday Party?
A: Freeze A Jolly Good Fellow!

Q: What cars do elves drive?
A: A toyYoda.

Q: How did Scrooge win the football game?
A: The ghost of Christmas passed

Q: What do you call Santa’s helpers?
A: Subordinate Clauses.

Q: What is Santa’s primary language?
A: North Polish.

Q: What do reindeer say before they tell a joke?
A: This will sleigh you

Q: Why did they couple get hitched on the 24 of December?
A: So they could have a married Christmas

Q: How do you lift a frozen car?
A: With a Jack Frost

Q: Which holiday mascot has the least spare change?
A: St. Nickel-less

Q: What would you call an elf who just has won the lottery?
A: Welfy

Q: How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?
A; He was hooked on trees his whole life

Q: How can you tell a family doesn’t celebrate Christmas?
A: The lights are on, but nobody’s a gnome.

Q: What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?
A: RUDEolph.

Q: Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past?
A: Because the present’s beneath them.

Q: What do you call an elf who sings?
A: A wrapper!

Q: What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A: A rebel without a Claus.

Q: What do you call a bankrupt Santa?
A: Saint Nickel-less.

Q: Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
A: It needed to be trimmed.

Q: Who is Santa’s favorite singer?
A: Elf-is Presley.

Q: What do the elves call it when Father Christmas claps his hands at the end of a play?
A: Santapplause!

Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.

Q: Why was Santa’s little helper feeling depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.

Q:What do you call Kris Kringle when he goes on his wife’s health insurance?
A: A dependent Claus.

Christmas: The time when everyone gets Santamental.

Q: Why did Santa bring 22 reindeer to Walmart?
A: Because what he wanted to buy cost around 20 bucks, but just in case it was more, he brought some extra doe.

Q: What kind of bike does Santa Claus ride?
A: A Holly Davidson.

Q: What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?
A: Santa Clues!

Q: When Santa is on the beach what do the elves call him?
A: Sandy Claus

Q: Why does Santa go down the chimney?
A: Because it soots him!

Q: What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?
A: Crisp Kringle.

Q: What’s Santa’s dog’s name?
A: Santa Paws!

Q: What’s as big as Santa but weighs nothing?
A: Santa’s shadow!

Q: Why did Santa put a clock in his sleigh?
A: Because he wanted to see time fly!

Is There a Santa? Food for thought. Hmmmmmm...

Consider the following:
* 1. Santa's Workload: 
      
** There are two billion children in the world, but since Santa doesn't appear to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, and Budist children, that reduces his workload to 15% of the total, or 300 million. At an average rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 85.7 million homes. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different times zones and the rotation of the Earth, assuming he travels East to West. This works out to 767.9 visits per second. So for each household with good children, Santa has about 1/1,000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the presents, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, into the sleigh and move on to the next house." 
      
* 
2. The Time/Distance Factor: 
      
** Assuming that these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the Earth, we're talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles. 
      
* 
3. Calculation of Estimated Speed:  
** This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, or 3,000 times the speed of sound. 
      

4. Santa's Payload: 
 
** Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a mdeium-size Lego set (about two pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as "heavy." On land, normal reindeer could pull no more than 300 pounds, and even granting that flying reindeer could pull 10 times the normal amount, Santa's going to need 214,200 reindeer to pull his sleigh. This increases the payload to 353,430 tons, or four times the weight of the "Queen Elizabeth." 
      
* 
Conclusion: 
      
** A craft of 353,000 tons, traveling at 650 miles per second, creates enormous air resistance. This will heat up Mr. Claus and his sleigh like a spacecraft reentering Earth's atmosphere. 
       

* Translation: 
      
** If there is a Santa, he's toast.

New Year's Resolutions

It is a time of resolutions.  I made one resolution many years ago and I have stuck to it.  I resolved to no longer make resolutions.  The following are some alternative affirmations for a new year.

 At the end of one year and the start of another, many of us will renew our commitment to living with daily affirmations. I know the power of affirming my truth, over and over, everyday! While these may not suit everyone's taste, here are some "possible" affirmations to consider!

1. As I let go of my feelings of guilt, I am in touch with my inner sociopath.
2. I have the power to channel my imagination into ever-soaring levels of suspicion and paranoia.
3. I assume full responsibility for my actions, except the ones that are someone else's fault.
4. In some cultures what I do would be considered normal.
5. My intuition nearly makes up for my lack of wisdom and judgment.
6. I need not suffer in silence while I can still moan, whimper, and complain.
7. When someone hurts me, I know that forgiveness is cheaper than a lawsuit, but not nearly as rewarding.
8. I am at one with my duality.
9. Blessed are the flexible, for they can tie themselves in knots.
10. I will strive to live each day as if it were my 50th birthday.
11. I honor and express all facets of my being, regardless of state and local laws.
12. Today I will gladly share my experience and advice, for there are no sweeter words than "I told you so!"
13. A scapegoat is almost as good as a solution.
14. Just for today, I will not sit in my living room all day in my underwear. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.
15. I will no longer waste my time reliving the past; I will spend it worrying about the future?
16. The complete lack of evidence is the surest proof that the conspiracy is working.
17. Before I criticize a man, I walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.

Happy New Year everyone. May your 2018 be better than 2017!!! May you be blessed & your life be filled with love, peace & prosperity. May you be able to deal with any and all challenges that life puts in your way. May you find that "missing" link and you are able to break thru that wall that keeps you from moving forward in your ancestral search!!!

To friends and relatives I have met through Geni

I have a list of people
All written in a book -
And every year at Christmas time
I go and take a look.

And that is when I realise
That those names are all a part -
Not of the book they're written in
But of my very heart.

For each name stands for someone
Who has crossed my path some time -
And in that meeting they've become
A treasured friend of mine.

And once you've met some people
The years can not erase -
The memory of a pleasant word
Or of a friendly face.

So when I send an email
That is addressed to you -
It's because you're on that 'Special list'
Of folk that I'm indebted to.

And you are one of several folk
In times past that I've met -
And happen to be one of those
I don't want ever to forget.

And whether I have known you
For many years or few -
In some way you have had a part
In shaping things I do.

So this, the Spirit of Christmas
That forever still endures -
May it leave its richest blessing
In the hearts of you and yours!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Colleen,
Thanks for the beautiful sentiment in a poem. It is so true. I hope everyone had a great Christmas or holiday and ALL have a very great new year with less challenges than in 2017!!!

Enough Happiness to Keep You Happy

During the year may you have
Enough happiness to keep you sweet,
Enough trials to keep you strong,
Enough sorrow to keep you human,
Enough hope to keep you happy,
Enough failure to keep you humble,
Enough success to keep you eager,
Enough friends to give you comfort,
Enough wealth to meet your needs,
Enough enthusiasm to make you
look forward to tomorrow,
Enough determination to make
each day better than the day before.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

Some of you may be "enjoying" (??????) the winter weather with the cold & snow. This may provide a chuckle. For those lucky enough to not have snow or cold weather, I hope you enjoy this story & also chuckle.

A Bit of Winter Humor—“Frosty”

A family that consists of three children decided that they wanted to build a snowman this week. The children involved are 15, 10 and 3-years-old. The youngest one soon got tired of building in the cold outside so he chucked it in and went indoors. The older two siblings continued to create their snowman while a neighborhood dog watched on.

Soon after the snowman was finished, the little boy went to the window and took a glance. Boy! Was he impressed! He called for his parents to come and take a look at the creation that he claimed total responsibility for building. LOL! His parents were quite happy with what they saw.

After awhile, the little boy decided that he would put on his coat and boots and go outside so that he could take a closer look at how "Frosty" looked on all sides. His family watched as a look of horror came across the 3-year-old's little face. He ran into the house and exclaimed to his family that the snowman was ALIVE!

You probably want to know where the child got this idea, right? Well, it seems as if the neighborhood dog eventually made its way to take a closer look also. While he was there, he pooped right next to Frosty. The little tyke is sticking to his story. Frosty is alive and well (and pooping) in their front yard.

Hope no one is offended by this, but it is funny!!! Wait till you get to the end -- I laughed until I had tears in my eyes.

What's he going to be?

An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment.
 
He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four objects:
1. A Bible
2. A silver dollar
3. A bottle of whiskey
4. A Playboy magazine.

"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself. "When he comes home from school today, I'll see which object he picks up."
"If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be!
"If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a business man and that would be okay, too.
"But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunken bum, and Lord, what a shame that would be.
"And worst of all if he picks up that magazine he's going to be a skirt-chasing womanizer."

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink, while he admired the magazine’s centerfold.

"Lord have mercy," the old preacher whispered. "He's gonna run for Congress.”

National Hug Day

National Hugging Day is an annual event dedicated to hugging. It was created by Kevin Zaborney and occurs annually on January 21. The day was first celebrated on January 21, 1986 in Clio, Michigan, USA. ... The idea of National Hug Day is to encourage everyone to hug family and friends more often. Zaborney cautions to ask first if one is unsure of the response. The purpose of the day is to help everyone show more emotion in public. There is only one way you are supposed to celebrate the holiday, offer a hug to anyone and everyone you want. Whether you hug a family member or a stranger, the mental and physical health benefits are the same.

Rev. Kevin Zaborney is credited with coming up with the idea & founding National Hugging Day on March 29, 1986 in Caro, Michigan. It was included in Chase's Calendar of Events; Zaborney's friend at the time was the granddaughter of the proprietors of the publication. He chose January 21 as it fell between the Christmas and New Year's Holidays and Valentine's Day and birthdays when he found people are generally in low spirits. Zaborney considered that "American society is embarrassed to show feelings in public" and hoped that a National Hugging Day would change that, although he thought that his idea would fail.

The benefits of a hug speaks for itself. In fact, according to a study at Carnegie Mellon published at US News & World Report, hugging can help you avoid getting sick because people who perceive greater social support (i.e. from a warm embrace) are less likely to catch a cold or other benign sickness. Move aside apples, hugs are the new thing to keep the doctor away.

Why are hugs so helpful? “Hugging is a marker of intimacy and helps generate the feeling that others are there to help in the face of adversity,” says one researcher from the Carnegie Mellon study. In addition to that, MBG Mindfulness, a blog for health and wellness, writes about 10 Reasons Why We Need at Least 8 Hugs a Day.

Here are some of those reasons:
* Holding a hug, hearts pressed together, increases serotonin levels, thereby elevating mood.
* Likewise, hugging releases oxytocin, a “bonding” hormone which creates attachment in relationships.
* Hugging relaxes muscles. When embracing in a hug, blood circulation increases, easing tension in muscles.
* Hugging pulls us into the moment and makes us dwell on the present. In addition to being a pivotal part of meditation, living in the present moment teaches us to build happiness and meaning and hold on to it.
* Hugging, an action that requires two willing participants, teaches us the give and take in building relationships.
* Hugging boosts self esteem and makes you feel better about yourself.
Hugs have been recently used as fundraisers. How many hugs can you give away to raise money for your favorite fundraiser?

So hugs help our health - mind, body and soul - in biological and spiritual ways. How many do we need each day to sustain these lasting benefits? According to Virginia Satir, the founder of Transformational Systemic Therapy, “we need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need twelve hugs a day for growth.” Clearly, hugging needs to be higher up on our to-do lists.

Consider this a virtual hug to all of the curators who are so willing to help us, to my cousins and to those not related -- May each of you in Geni consider yourself hugged!!!
So open your arms & receive a virtual hug. I'll know you received it when i feel a tug.

Pat

Puns for Educated People...

1. The meaning of opaque is unclear.

2. I wasn’t going to get a brain transplant but then I changed my mind.

3. Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It’s very time consuming.

4. A man tried to assault me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy!

5. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.

6. If there was someone selling marijuana in our neighborhood, weed know about it. 

7.  It’s a lengthy article about ancient Japanese sword fighters but I can Sumurais it for you. 

8.  It’s not that the man couldn’t juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.

9. So what if I don’t know the meaning of the word ‘apocalypse’? It’s not the end of the world.

10. Police were called to the daycare center. A 3-year old was resisting a rest. 

11. The other day I held the door open for a clown. I thought it was a nice jester.

12. Need an ark to save two of every animal? I Noah guy.

13. Alternative facts are aversion of the truth.

14. I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

15. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

16. Did you know they won’t be making yardsticks any longer?

17. I used to be allergic to soap but I’m clean now.

18. The patron saint of poverty is St. Nickeless.

19. What did the man say when the bridge fell on him? The suspension is killing me.

20. Do you have weight loss mantras? Fat chants!

21. My tailor is happy to make a new pair of pants for me. Or sew it seams.

22. What is a thesaurus’s favorite dessert? Synonym buns.

23. A relief map shows where the restrooms are.

24. There was a big paddle sale at the boat store. It was quite an oar deal.

25. How do they figure out the price of hammers? Per pound.

Oooooops!!!

One Little Mistake!
 
Let me tell you friends that one simple spelling mistake--even a typo--can make your life hell. I recently texted a short, romantic note to my wife while I was away on a fishing trip, and I missed one small "e".

No problem you might say.   Not so. This tiny error has caused me to seek Police protection to enter my own house.

I wrote, "Hi darling, I'm enjoying and experiencing the best time of my whole life, and I wish you were her!”

Beware of Seniors - we are smarter than you think !

SENIOR CITIZEN'S DISCOUNT

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive,
double-pane, energy-efficient kind.

Today, I got a call from Home Depot who installed them. The caller
complained that the work had been completed a year ago and I still
hadn't paid for them.

Hello, just because I'm a Senior Citizen doesn't mean that I am
automatically mentally challenged.

So, I told him just what his fast-talking sales guy told me last year --
that these windows would pay for themselves in a year.

Hello! It's been a year, so they're paid for, I told him. There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally hung up. He never
called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.

I love the above story even if it is a "joke". I think I have seen the above but with a blond instead of a senior as the person involved. Seniors do have more experience to take advantage of. Wonder if this logic would work in reality?????? Businesses, beware!!!

Hope you laugh, chuckle, or say "Oh, ya!!!" to some of these!!! Have a great day.

TWENTY-NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.
10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. Nyquil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!
17. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
18. Procrastinate Now!
I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26. Ham and eggs... A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
28. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
29. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!
Life is too short and friends are too few!

5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

Yes, but death is just a synonym for ultimate freedom, probably something many look forward to...

“Secrets of Our Age”
(Some of these really hit home)

I recently changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way much faster now.

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.

I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying, “I went to the Jim this morning. “

Old age is coming at a really bad time.

When I was a child I thought “Nap Time” was a punishment. Now, as a grownup, it feels like a small vacation.

The biggest lie I tell myself is... “I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."

I don’t have gray hair; I have "wisdom highlights"! I’m just very wise.

If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them on my knees.

Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet.

Why do I have to press one for English, when you’re just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?

Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice.

At my age “Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I went in there for.

Actually I'm not complaining because I am a Senager. (Senior teenager) I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 60 years later. I don’t have to go to school or work. I get an allowance every month. I have my own pad. I don’t have a curfew. I have a driver’s license and my own car. The people I hang around with are not scared of getting pregnant. And I don’t have acne

Life is great.....
I have more friends I should send this to, but right now I can’t remember their names.

Now, I’m wondering… did I send this to you, or did you send it to me?

Thank you Patricia I enjoyed that very much! Had a good laugh!!

Bus Trip
 
To help save the economy, the Government will announce next month that the Immigration Department will start deporting seniors (instead of illegals) in order to lower Social Security and Medicare costs.
 
Older people are easier to catch and will not remember how to get back home.
 
I started to cry when I thought of you.
 
Then it dawned on me ... oh, crap ... I'll see you on the bus!

Dad at the Mall

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, 'What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?' Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one, and in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response.

'Got drunk once, and slept with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.'

I don't know if this story is funny or not, but it is true. After being on a quest for distant ancestors on geni I found a connection to Abiel Tripp. After excitedly chasing that line thru Deliverance Hall all the way back to a daughter of Aminadab with a Celtic Queen, supposedly a line to the Holy Grail and Jesus and Mary Magdalene's son Josephus, I was overjoyed! That line has since been disconnected as fictional. However, I discovered upon review that there were 3 Abiels in that timespan and I had traced the wrong one! Oh well, the joke is on me! I thought the coincidences too many, because my paternal line could only be traced to great grandparents in WI, but my paternal grandmother's family came from Alsace Lorraine and her name was Mary Magdalena Bohl, and her husband was John Nikolaus Bowe. So I already had descent from St. John, St. Nicholas, & Mary Magdalene! Future research did find a direct link on another part of my tree to the St. Clair Scottish clan... Oh how we deceive ourselves with dreams and visions? Is it funny? Yes, to me anyway...